Sunday, August 24, 2025

Inevitable

Can I make kwento—a weird little story? But don’t get scared. Sa tanda kong ito, marami na akong napagdaanan. Recently, I realized something that makes me curious. It’s weird. But maybe it’s nothing. You decide.

People who have hurt me in the past ended up dying difficult, natural deaths—stroke, lingering illness, slow decline. I had nothing to do with it. Matagal ko na silang napatawad. And yet... how odd, right?

I take no pleasure in their horrible deaths. I never wished it. But I remembered that when I was struggling to forgive them—kasi ang sakit-sakit talaga ng ginawa nila sa akin—this Bible verse always gave me comfort: “Do not look for revenge but leave room for the wrath; for it is written, ‘Vengeance is mine, I will repay, says the Lord.’” (Romans 12:19). Leaving it in God’s hands has allowed me to let go of the pain, forgive, and move on. 

And then… I started noticing the pattern.

My Lolo Manong, Lola Auring, Papa and Mama. They're gone now. But they made sure to warn me about gabâ.  

My parents and grandparents are from Leyte and Samar. They call it gabâ. 

Ang gabâ dili magsaba.” 

Retribution doesn’t announce itself. It just comes. It is inevitable. 

My Lola used to say that even if you forgive, the universe still needs to balance the wrong. Kaya daw dapat maging mabait ako. Because even if I repent, the universe will demand justice. Scary, no?


Anyway! I don’t wish anyone harm. But I find myself watching, wondering, waiting—how the story of four more people who hurt me deeply will eventually unfold. Four more people I'm now looking at with trepidation. Because if there’s one thing I’ve learned, it’s this: gabâ always comes.

*Ripples photo by Vitaly K. on Unsplash

Saturday, August 09, 2025

What I’m Doing Now—and What I Still Dream Of

Some of you have asked what I’m up to lately (or maybe you haven’t, but I’m telling you anyway), so here’s a little work update! With photos of me at the office, too.


I’m currently with Personal Collection, a proudly Pinoy direct selling company with a mission to help Filipino families live a #LifeMadeGreat by having their own business. What do I do there? A bit of everything I'm really good at—social media posts, scripts for events and videos, blog posts, posters, brochures, magalogues, flyers, posters. I also manage our ambassador program. It’s easy work. Just LOTS of it. But it's fun! And I get tons of free products every month, too! (I'll do a giveaway soon of our lipsticks!)

Everyone introduces me as "the writer". Officially, I'm the communications manager. It's a broad enough title that if I were to resign, they'll have to hire a copywriter, SEO writer, social media manager, influencer program manager, dealer storytelling strategist, dealer comms and program coordinator, and creative project manager to replace me! 

What makes my job meaningful is that the target market of all the comms we make is our own dealers. So we're not your regular in-house ad agency broadcasting to the end-consumer; we're communicating with our dealers, showing them how to sell their products, and manage and grow their business. Every weekday, I think of how to make our dealers feel proud of what they do. And because I’m all about women empowerment, I find it incredibly fulfilling to see the transformed lives of our million-strong dealers, many of whom are mothers like me. So there is a purpose in what I do.

But... life can't be perfect. 

Many of my dear Loyal Readers (the WAHMs and the housewives) have asked me how going back to work feels like, and for so long I couldn't answer. But I think I'm ready now. 

So here comes the real talk! I spend 10 hours a day at the office. I really try not to go beyond that because I promised my kids I won't, so overtime feels like me betraying my promise. I'm glad to report that OT rarely happens because I really finish my tasks within those 10 hours. 

Ten hours at work plus 1.5 hours commute is a huge shift for someone who was with her husband and sons 24/7 for an entire decade. These days, I barely see them, and that’s hard on the heart. It really, really is. I spent my first 9 months at work crying, grieving my time away from my family, worried sick about them, and finally feeling that working-mom guilt I never felt when I was a mommy blogger and freelance writer and editor. 

I keep reminding myself that I’m paid well enough, the work has purpose, and my kids are thriving in school and with friends. But, wow, I can't stop missing my family. I'm almost 3 years in the corporate world and I’m still not used to being away from Vince and the boys. 

Let's not forget that I also have a writing and editing business, a business that I've only slowly resurrected this year with a few blogging and writing projects. So I'm happy about that! 

I'm also still dreaming of more books to write. The utter joy I got from my Not Invisible book was so addictive, I want to feel that again and again. These dreams of new books are in the process of becoming real because I’ve got half a dozen book manuscripts just waiting to be finished, but no time (yet!) to work on them. Still, I managed to write a couple of children’s books recently so... hooray! I hope to publish them one day, with my devotionals and novels, too. 

One day, one day.

Honestly, mamas, if you're thinking of going back to work after the incredible privilege of being with your babies, well... It's not easy. I don't want to discourage you because there's so much satisfaction in doing what you're good at and earning recognition and money for it. 

But it's hard to juggle that with wanting to relish any little time we can find with our family. Work can always be done and money can always be made, but time with our children? The time is so very short. Terrifyingly short. Sooner than I know, they're off to college, off to new adventures, off to a life without their Mama.

Can you believe it? Didn't I just give birth to them yesterday? 

I feel like I'm running out of time.

It's so strange how both grief and joy, and longing and contentment can hold space inside me all in the same breath. Yes, I’m doing well. I’m grateful for this job and would like to keep it. I thank God every day that I get to enjoy this amazing blessing. But I ask Him just as often if this is what He wants for me because I miss my boys so much

Do I want to earn a regular income? Yes.

Do I want to spend more time with my teens and tween? Yes.

Do I wish I had more time to write my books? Yes. 

Do I enjoy making content to help our dealers become more successful women? Yes.

Do I look at my messy house and think, "This home needs a mother's loving touch again"? Yes.

Do I try not to think about how we haven't had any activities for Lean In Manila this year? Er, yes.

Do I also recognize how good I’ve got it right now? Absolutely.

Oh, it's complex, this tug of war in my heart. I know life can’t be perfect... but mine is pretty close. So I'll remain grateful. 

And open. 

And waiting.


Monday, August 04, 2025

5 Lessons from Meghan Sussex on Navigating Life with Grace and Purpose


I'm so inspired by Meghan, Duchess of Sussex. 

I'm absolutely sure I have none of her resilience and grace, the strength that not only makes her survive the constant hate but even thrive despite it. When she started 2025 with a carefree run on the beach, we didn't realize that she meant to go full blast this year... but not full blast retaliation on all the horrible creatures who hate her, but a full blast on creativity. The world wanted to destroy her, so she responded with creation. 

And, whether we appreciate it or not, we're getting Meghan's projects one after the other. Just for the first half of this year, we have a TV show, a lifestyle brand, a podcast, and a shopping site! The Duchess of Success!

But more than that, because it's her birthday, I want to talk about the life lessons I learned from Meghan. And she truly has been offering a masterclass in focus and authenticity. I like her approach to life because it's filled with powerful lessons we can all learn from.
  
1. Stay true to who you are.

Before becoming a royal wife, Meghan was busy not just with her work as an actress, but also with helping charities and empowering women, while also building a lifestyle blog. She chose to marry a man whose goal was to help people, too. When she was a working royal, she immediately got busy with the same, marrying her love for fashion, cooking, and women, with the charities she worked with. 

Now, her circumstances have changed, but she's still the same! Everything she's doing now still reflects her personal values of authenticity, intentional living, and service. Whether it’s through mindful products or purposeful storytelling, Meghan showed me that we should align our work with our values. That's how we don't get lost when life's storms and temptations come crashing your way. 

Stay true to what matters to you, whether you have an audience or not. Stay true to yourself. Don't be shaped by what the world says you should be.

When nothing seems to be going right, focus on the things that do! Family, friends, food, fun!

2. Focus on the work.

I think everyone has experienced being mocked, insulted, and discouraged. Maybe not on a global scale, sure, but I can relate somewhat - just a tiny, tiny bit - to Meghan. I didn't get support growing up because people dismissed my dreams a lot. When you're raised in a fundamentalist Christian environment and a traditional Filipino household, you're taught that women aren't supposed to have dreams, unless it's a dream of wife and mom. Which is great! I'm a wife and mom. And more! Like Meghan, I refused to be discouraged and got busy building. 

That said, I did start this blog almost 20 years ago because I wanted to be understood. I don't regret it because my life changed exponentially because of this blog. Watching Meghan, however, makes me think I wish I had had her grace. She refuses to engage in the hateful conversations. She doesn't waste time defending herself or making herself understood. Instead, she pours her energy into meaningful projects. She proves that healing comes from creating, not from explaining yourself even through constant criticism (even of her pasta!). 

Here's my version of her Single Skillet Pasta. Instead of lemon, I used calamansi to add brightness and freshness to what would've been a plain dish.

 3. Take your time.

Yes, she focused on work, but it took her 5 years to stage her comeback. She took her time. People find this hard to believe. They always accuse her of doing interviews regularly, but before this year, she only did a few, like Oprah, Ellen, and The New York Times. She had a few projects (her children's book, a documentary, a podcast), but mostly, she stayed hidden away at home, making and raising babies. Making friends with her neighbors. Investing in women-owned businesses. And apparently, she was also quietly preparing for her comeback.

This is a powerful lesson in protecting your peace—less reacting, more building. A lesson also on moving quietly with people you trust. A lesson on patience and waiting for the right time to launch. She wasn't worried about staying relevant. She just trusted herself and her timing. 

In my case, I'll always be grateful my husband and I had the immense privilege of working from home the first 10 years we were parents. People were worried about us quitting employment. But Vince was writing his novel while I was blogging. Unconventional, maybe, but true to who we are (writers)... and who we've become (parents!). We didn't feel like life passed us by at all. We were living it and oh so thoroughly!

Your life, your pace.  

4. Pursue joy!

I really liked her Netflix series, With Love, Meghan. As you can see, I've shared a few photos of stuff I learned from her show. I love how she shares how she makes ordinary things special. Some, I admit I won't ever do. I can't ever be persuaded to make my own candles when I can buy from my friend who does make such wonderful ones (buy from Meadow!). But I agree that life is bad and boring enough already. Let's add some joy! Why wallow in the bland, the ugly, and the miserable, right? 

So I bought flowers. I took out my jewelry. I'm intentional with my self-care. I'm seeing family and friends. I'm eating more fruits and veggies (okay, I'm still learning to find joy in this). I want to live in beauty and glow with joy! I mean, just look at Meghan - moisturized, fit, fab.

If you want edible flower sprinkles, you can get from Landers.

5. Turn pain into a paycheck.

As Alessia Cara sang in her song, "Okay Okay," we have the option to turn pain into a paycheck. Meghan may have gone through horrific treatment for almost a decade (and she's still getting bullied by the most evil old and ugly people in the world), but she keeps creating. Whether it's a family and a home or business deals, she’s proof that forward momentum is the best response to negativity. I especially like how she now has a shopping site. Not only do we now know exactly what she uses, she also took away from those evil tabloids their income from affiliate links. If there's anyone who should earn from her lifestyle choices, it should be her. 
 

Meghan Sussex shows us that success doesn’t have to be loud and quick. It doesn't have to be constant visibility. You can be at home, picking berries and making crudites (my literal word of the year haha), and still dream and make money. Just stick to who you are and what you love, and you'll be more than okay. Okay?

Happy birthday, Meghan!

Saturday, July 26, 2025

Guess What, Moms? Watsons is Now Open 24/7 in Select Branches!

Let’s be real—life as a mom doesn’t follow store hours.

Whether it’s a feverish child at 2 am, a sudden breakout before a big meeting, or just a much-needed self-care moment after everyone’s finally asleep, emergencies and “me time” don’t clock out. That’s why I'm happy to report that Watsons now has 24/7 branches!

Yes, you read that right—some Watsons stores are now open all day, all night, making it easier for busy moms like us to grab health, wellness, and beauty essentials whenever we need them. I personally live near a Watsons and find myself dropping by almost weekly (sometimes more). I buy skincare for me and the boys, pick up my asthma, pills, and cholesterol meds, and sometimes I buy a treat for the kids.

And now? Even if something comes up late at night (like last week when my son had a raging skin infection!), I know I have options.


More Ways to Shop, More Hours to Breathe

Watsons has always been a go-to for moms, and they’re stepping up even more with longer store hours, Click & Collect through the Watsons App, and home delivery—a lifesaver on those “no one is getting out of the house” kind of days.

This year alone, they opened 29 new branches, including several 24/7 locations in Manila and Cebu. These stores are fully stocked with everything from prescription meds and vitamins to skincare favorites, baby essentials, and even that mascara you forgot to replace.

Watsons’s goal? To support us in our health, wellness, and beauty journeys—no matter what time it is.
 
Here Are Some 24/7 Branches Near Metro Manila Moms:
  • The Medical City, Pasig
  • Taft, Ermita
  • Tayuman, Manila
  • Zabarte Road, North Caloocan
  • Guadalupe, Makati
  • BGC High Street South & Forbeswood Parklane
  • Bayani Road, Taguig
  • E. Rodriguez, QC
  • Marikina Shoe Ave
(And more in Luzon, Cebu, and Davao—full list linked below!)


Because Moms Don’t Sleep—And Apparently, Neither Does Watsons

So the next time you run out of paracetamol, need a last-minute gift, or just want a new face mask to unwind with, remember: Watsons is there for you, 24/7.

This one I haven't tried so let me know your experience but you can also shop from home via the Watsons App, enjoy exclusive promos, and choose to have your orders delivered or ready for pick-up—easy peasy for us multitasking mamas, especially in this crazy weather.

Check the full list of 24/7 Watsons branches here:
https://www.watsons.com.ph/watsons-24-7-stores

Because looking good and feeling good shouldn’t have to wait ‘til morning! 


*Photos courtesy of Browne Communications

Wednesday, July 23, 2025

The sad and scary mystery that is depression

I saw something that made me sad the other day. A birthday greeting for Robin Williams from his son, Zak, on what would've been Robin's 74th birthday had he not taken his life 9 years ago. 


Even now, people are still sad. I'm so sad, too. He was my favorite actor and such a funny guy. So many stories of his goodness and kindness made me love him even more. And yet I always wondered why he had such sad eyes. Turned out he was suffering depression. Was it because he never recovered from a lonely childhood, no matter how privileged? Was it because despite his massive success, he was afraid he'd fail? No one knows. That's the thing with depression. No one knows what causes it.

Depression is very scary. I had a mild taste of it when each of my children was born. Yes, I experienced post-partum blues after every baby. The first time it happened was terrifying. There I was—happy marriage, great career, good health, new mother to a perfect baby boy—and I wept every single day for six long weeks. 

No one understood how someone so blessed could be in such a dark place. People I told were confused, exasperated, annoyed, dismissive. What I hated hearing most was, "You should be grateful and happy. How can you think only of yourself?" 

I knew that already. I wasn't stupid. I knew my life was amazing. That's why the overwhelming sadness I felt made me afraid for my sanity. It just didn't make sense! Why was I so unhappy?! It was one of the most terrible times of my life, made sadder by the fact that it should've been the happiest. 

I'm grateful my husband stood by me throughout that time. He never called me out, never told me to get over it. That first time, he just took time off work (all 6 weeks I was depressed and in a country that granted only 7 days paternity leave) to be with me. He helped take care of our baby, and when I finally climbed out of my depression, he was there to welcome me back into the world. 

If you're feeling out of sorts and you know it's different and worry it may be serious, here's a short article that may help:

Understanding Depression: The Silent Epidemic

Depression affects millions of people around the world. It’s a deep, often overwhelming feeling of sadness that doesn’t go away. Despite how common it is, depression remains misunderstood and stigmatized. Many hide their struggles, thinking they’re alone in this dark world. Let's explore the mysterious nature of depression, its serious impact, and ways we can better understand and combat it.

Depression isn’t just feeling sad for a day. It’s a mental health disorder that can change your entire life. The most common type is major depressive disorder, which causes ongoing feelings of hopelessness and loss of interest in things once enjoyed. Other forms include dysthymia, a chronic but less severe depression, and bipolar depression, which features extreme mood swings.

Many confuse normal sadness with depression, but clinical depression lasts for weeks or months. It can make even simple tasks feel impossible, like climbing out of bed or eating properly.

Prevalence and Impact

Depression is one of the most common mental health problems worldwide. According to the World Health Organization, over 264 million people struggle with it. It affects people of all ages, backgrounds, and cultures.

Living with depression hurts more than just mental health. It impacts daily routines, makes work and relationships difficult, and can even lead to physical health problems. The toll is heavy, not only on individuals but also on families and communities.

Why Is It Considered a Mystery?

Despite so many suffering, doctors still find depression hard to fully understand. Symptoms can vary wildly from one person to another. Some people have trouble sleeping, while others sleep too much. Some feel exhausted, while others can’t stop racing thoughts.

This variability makes diagnosis complex. Plus, biological, psychological, and social factors all mix together to create depression’s tricky puzzle. We know it’s not simply a chemical imbalance, but scientists are still searching for solid answers.

The Darkness Within: Symptoms and Diagnosis Challenges

Recognizing the Signs

Depression often shows up as persistent sadness, loss of pleasure, or feelings of worthlessness. Physical signs include changes in sleep – sleeping too much or too little – and appetite problems. Some people might withdraw from friends or lose interest in hobbies.

But many hide their symptoms. Why? Stigma keeps people silent. They fear judgment, especially if they appear successful or “high-functioning.” This means depression can stay hidden behind a brave face.

The Hidden Nature of Depression

Many who seem to have everything together still suffer quietly. From top executives to stay-at-home parents, anyone can hide signs of depression. This masks the true scope of the problem.

Diagnostic Difficulties

Mental health professionals rely on conversations and assessments to diagnose depression. It’s not always straightforward. Symptoms overlap with other mental or physical conditions. An accurate diagnosis often takes time and patience.

The Roots of Depression: What Causes the Darkness?

Biological Factors

Sometimes depression runs in families. Scientists believe genetics play a big role. Imbalances in brain chemicals, like serotonin and dopamine, also contribute. Changes in brain structure—like smaller hippocampi—are linked to depression too. While these facts help explain some cases, they don’t tell the whole story.

Psychological Factors

Trauma, especially in childhood, can set the stage for depression later. Chronic stress or personal setbacks build up over time. People with certain personality traits—like high sensitivity or low self-esteem—are more prone to depression. Cognitive patterns, like negative thinking, also shape how someone reacts to life's challenges.

Social and Environmental Influences

Your surroundings matter. Living in poverty, feeling isolated, or facing cultural stigma can increase depression risk. For example, someone who loses their job and feels disconnected may slip deeper into depression. Real stories show how environment plays a huge role in triggering or worsening depression.

The Scary Unknowns

Despite advances, science still doesn’t fully understand what causes depression. New theories emerge all the time, suggesting complex interactions between genes, environment, and brain chemistry. The unknowns can make the fight feel endless, fostering fear and helplessness.


When I talked about my experience with my OBG, she said that what I felt was just the baby blues, a mild form of postpartum depression. Mild? It was awful! Apparently,  when you have PPD, you think about harming yourself or the baby. Since I wasn't in total despair, she said, I was apparently okay. Even though I certainly did not feel okay. 

And then depression came back for me a couple of years ago, and that was so bad, so very bad. I'm so glad I'm better now, but I am in tenterhooks, wary of it coming back again. Today feels like a ceasefire. For many people with depression, it is a constant battle. Sometimes, like Mr. Williams, they lose. 

If someone you know is depressed, please don't dismiss them. Depressed people need help, but are scared to ask because nothing is scarier than being called crazy. If you are depressed, you're not crazy. Just please tell someone and continue asking for help till someone acknowledges you. It's this world that's crazy, but some people do care, and some people are brave enough to help. Please be brave enough to ask for help. 


If you are in emotional crisis, need counselors to talk to about suicide and mental health, or are having suicidal thoughts, call the 24/7 CRISIS LINE anytime for non-sectarian, non-judgmental telephone counseling:
toll-free landline (1553)
0917-899-8727 for Globe/TM
0919-057-1553 for Smart/TNT

If you have just lost someone to suicide and need help with coping, visit www.afsp.org/survivingsuicideloss.

For mental awareness, visit: