My first name always gets massacred. Francis. Franzen. Princess. Pansit. My last name is pretty simple but it's spelled as Salas, Sanchez and Sally. I'm exasperated but I'm used to it because I grew up with people wondering about my maiden name, too, which is Amper. Amper is not so common so people turn it into Amber, Ampere, Unfair. So I'm quite used to people not remembering my name. Then there are also a lot of people who can't forget my name because apparently it's unusual.
Frances Amper.
I think it's a pretty name. An intelligent name. I love my former name. I love it so much that when I got married, I didn't change my name. My husband is Vince Sales and his wife—me—is Frances Amper.
I also married at 30 and have built a career with that name so I didn't want to change my name. But on our first anniversary, Vince said he'd like for us to share the same last name. So, because I promised to love and obey, I changed my name to Frances Sales.
I use Frances Amper Sales professionally. Because of that, I guess that's why people address correspondence to me as such: "To Ms. Frances Amper-Sales."
My last name is just Sales. It isn't hyphenated. When you hyphenate a last name, that means you use the whole thing, so if we must be formal, I'd be addressed as "Ms. Amper-Sales." On invitations and letters addressed to us as a couple, the correct address is "To Vince Sales and Frances Amper-Sales." But my last name isn't Amper-Sales. It's just Sales. No hyphen. So you can write on the envelope, "To Vince and Frances Sales."
This is correct because Amper is my middle name. |
This is incorrect because my last name isn't Amper-Sales. |
In normal, ordinary life, that's the name I use. When I introduce myself to my kids' friends, teachers, to my husband's friends, I'm Frances Sales. In the last couple of years, I've dropped my maiden name, however. I now just tell people—whether I work with them or not—to address me as Frances Sales. It's simpler.
I like my name now because it rhymes. Someone even asked me if that was a stage name I invented. Haha, it's my real name, folks. I really married a Mr. Sales and I married him for love not because I wanted a name that rhymed.
Was it difficult for me to become a Ms. Sales, to let go of my father's name and take on my husband's name? Well, in the beginning, yes. I'm attached to Amper. I mean, I've been attached to it all my life! But I like that I changed my name. Here are my reasons:
- To my surprise, I actually loved that my new name made me feel like I am one with my husband. We're a team. That's what married life is all about!
- I liked how symbolic it was to drop my maiden name—it didn't just usher in a new life as a married woman; it also reminded me that I was leaving my family. By changing my name, I felt like life was going to be better because I'm a new person now. I have a new name!
- When the children came, I was happy I shared their last name. We were all the same, in the same team, one family unit. My new name told my kids that I belong to their papa, I belong to them, and that they all belong to me.
- I actually like that my name rhymes!
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