TOPAZ HORIZON

I have really amazing news, dear Loyal Readers!

Last weekend, on Sept. 26 at the Work-at-Home Expo 2015, my friends Ginger Arboleda of entrepreneurial lifestyle blog Mommy Ginger, Martine de Luna of intentionally blissful lifestyle blog Make It Blissful, and myself of this all-about-honesty-in-an-increasingly-fake-world blog launched our new business—Beauty Biz Bliss.

Me, Ginger and Martine onstage at the Work-at-Home Expo.

Beauty Biz Bliss caters to the woman who has made a living out of her passion. We want to support this amazing woman in everything she does—from looking and feeling her best as she works to growing her business and managing her home and family with a blissful attitude even with all the work she's busy with.

As working women ourselves—Ginger owns several businesses, Martine is a social media consultant, while I am a professional blogger and magazine editor—we've encountered many challenges that come with pursuing our passions. Isolation is top of the list. Working from home, our days filled with dirty diapers and typing on a computer, there's hardly any time to create and nurture friendships. Having no co-workers and bosses also means we have no sounding board on our performance. When we do go out for meetings and events, how exactly do we present ourselves as professionals when we're used to wearing tees and shorts when we work?

Another challenge we encountered was the fiercely competitive nature of blogging. Mom blogging to be more specific. We think maybe this is because we raise our children in many different ways—some breastfeed, some give formula; some believe in tough love, some adhere to attachment parenting principles; some believe in sending their kids to traditional schools, some are staunch homeschoolers. Perhaps these differences raise our defenses, thinking that because someone's ways are different than ours, her actions are a criticism of our decisions. In our experience, we have been shunned, bullied, gossiped about, and even threatened just because we live the way we do, which was painful to us.


We now believe that there is no need to compete for readers and brands. We all have our own unique strengths, after all. Ginger wants to empower entrepreneurial mothers through her blog—naturally her readers are business-minded mothers. Martine's blog is all about having an inspired vision, purpose and lifestyle—her community of readers is made up of positive women who love beautiful everything. My blogging is all about being real and honest in absolutely everything, even when life gets ugly, I will talk about it like it's no one's business—and my readers are all feisty, brutal and no-nonsense women. We attract different kinds of readers and different kinds of brand partners.

There is no need to compete!

Especially because we three have the same purpose—to empower women. When we collaborate, we make each other stronger. For one thing, working together helps us reach a bigger audience. We strongly believe that we women should be encouraging each other, working together, and finding ways to live with each other's differences, maybe even celebrating them! We believe in collaboration, not competition.


That's how Beauty Biz Bliss was born! We talked about what we're good at and what we're poor at and realized we can help each other out. Martine is absolutely driven with ideas and vision, and she's great at making things look pretty. Ginger is all about execution with frightening efficiency, and she knows how to make money. And I have experience working with big brands, and my years in magazines have taught me a lot about looking fabulous. Together, we can build each other up where we think we need help.

We also realized that many women need support and encouragement, too. In fact, a thread in the Facebook community, WAHMderful Community for Work-at-Home Moms, encouraged us to create workshops addressing this very need of many women. So okay! Let's do this!

Beauty Biz Bliss will offer workshops on everything a working woman needs to juggle her full life. We'll learn how to put on makeup in 10 minutes, what to wear to meetings and events (especially useful to women who work at home), on how to build your brand, market it and get more business, and how to balance that all with joy not stress. We are planning big and beautiful events! Yes, so we can all get together with other women and share stories, swap business contacts, and build each other up. We also plan to work with brands that want to target us working women and offer them our unique voices to help push their campaigns.


Sooo exciting! We really want to help us women encourage each other (yes, we hope you also encourage Ginger, Martine and myself) with this new collaboration. Isn't this so exciting!?

If you want to be part of our new community, please like our Facebook page: Beauty Biz Bliss.

If you are a business that wants to reach our audience of empowered working women, send an email to ginger@beautybizbliss.com.

If you want to collaborate with us for gorgeous and inspiring events, email martine@beautybizbliss.com.

If you are a beauty and fashion brand and you want to be part of our mission to help women be absolutely gorgeous, email me at frances@beautybizbliss.com.

Together, we can all make a difference in women's lives. We really do believe that the secret of the universe is working together. I hope you think so, too! Imagine what we can all do when we help each other! I'm so excited. Please pray for us, okay? Thanks always for the love and support!

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And golden tips not just for Stephen Colbert but also for everyone with a lifestyle blog or website. Like me!

But first, a background:

Last week, new The Late Show host Stephen Colbert poked fun at all the lifestyle brands popping up everywhere. Watch:



Hilarious because it's so very true—every single thing he said. But, hey, I love Gwyneth, Reese, Ellen, and Blake! Why? Because unlike many people, I don't want my celebrities to be just like us. I want them to be gorgeous and perfect, impeccably dressed, living a lifestyle that is so impossibly fantastic, that will always be beyond my reach. I want them to be goddesses. I mean, there are women that inspire me to be better, to make me aspire for more. Then there are women that I just want to entertain me, and not entertain with tabloid drama but with an ethereal, out-of-my-world kind of lifestyle.

Yes, I love all these lifestyle brands my favorite celebrities are doing! Even though we all know that their brands border on the ridiculous!

I loved it especially when Gwyneth, my former life peg (former because her marriage ended and I can't aspire for that!), retorted to Colbert's mockery of her Goop-ness with this clever article: 6 Fail-Proof Tips for Launching a Men's Lifetsyle Site. I snorted with laughter when I read this welcoming line, "It's about time someone brought a sausage or two to this clam bake."

What I appreciated more was the advice she gives. Here's the not-so-funny summary hidden underneath her 6 cheeky tips:

1. Look good.
In the world of social media, what you look like matters. Whether you see that as fortunate or unfortunate, that's how the online world works. People think if you look good, you're credible. It's not as shallow as it sounds. If you want people to think you care about what you write about, then you must care about all the other details—including your appearance.

2. Be in the know.
You have to be the first to report an event, a new find, a new recipe, a new everything. But as there is, crazily enough, nothing new under the sun, you can also just retell something old in a fresh new angle, give it a new spin, make it your own. If you're the first, people will share your article or photo. If you're original, then even better.

3. Promote in every way you know.
In the vastness of cyberspace, how do you stand out? Yep, you may be original but if no one knows about it, then all is for naught. Use SEO, use click bait (ugh, I know everyone hates this but it works), and promote your blog/product/website/article on every social media platform.  

4. Create a reputation for curation.
Share what you love. Be generous with what you know. People like finding out about new stuff, what works, what doesn't, what's worth spending on. You don't have to be Goop-levels about it, but once people know you like certain things—from colors and words you constantly use to food and places you adore!—they associate you with it and will always think about you when they encounter it. For example, I always think of George Takei when I see, "Ohhh myyyy." I think of Barbie when I see bubblegum pink.

5. Cook. And eat.
Well, as Goop said, "every lifestyle brand worth its salt has a food section." But what a food section does is it makes the brand relatable because we all eat. We're all interested in food. We all love food. And we all like people just a bit more when we know they love to eat. Even when the ingredients are all kale and chia seeds and quinoa, right???

6. Have integrity. 
But seriously, whether you love simple hearty meals or a menu featuring Russian caviar, whether you enjoy a staycation with your favorite DVDs or indulge in jetsetter holidays, whether you decorate with thrift finds or with furniture flown in from Scandinavia, always feature stuff you love, you tested, you approve. Don't feature it just because it's new—do so because you love it. Don't blog about a TV phenomenon because it has 25 million Tweets if you don't genuinely follow it. Be yourself. Be honest. Be real.

There you go—advice from the queen of all lifestyle brands herself (sorry, Martha Stewart!). Now, let's all do what Goop says! Good luck!

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I just realized this year that I am an entrepreneur because my blogging is my business. It's not a hobby anymore.

Enjoying all my roles. Here I am mother, blogger and teacher.

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Good morning, everyone! I'm curious to know what your morning routine is, especially those who are moms. I need a morning routine that will work for me. Whatever I'm doing now is just not helping me or my family.

I don't want to give a too detailed account of my mornings but let me just say that I have finally acknowledged that waking up after the kids is not ideal. I really must rise with them, or before they do. That means I have to wake up at 6:30. Trouble is I get up at 8 and that's because my kids are either fighting or yelling for us to wash their butts (they don't like the yayas to do it), and then we're up in a panic and then the rest of the day unfolds in a rushed and chaotic manner.

I wish I could wake up before the kids do. I've tried. I just end up like a zombie. That's because I stayed up late the night before. I usually sleep at 2 or 3 a..m. That gives me 5-6 hours of interrupted sleep. Interrupted by breastfeedings and cuddles from all three kids. (Maybe it's time to wean so I can sleep with my husband instead!) I also can't sleep well with my kids because a little cough, a murmur, or a whimper from a nightmare wakes me up. Imagine that multiplied by 3 boys and then you get a picture of my troubled slumber.

I need to sleep. If I wake up at 6, that means just 3 hours of sleep!

Anyway, a working mom advised me to sleep when the kids sleep (that will be 8:30 p.m.), then wake at 3 a.m. to start my day. I get peace and quiet for 3 hours, which will allow me to focus on work, prayer, myself and home management. It sounds heavenly. Three hours of peace and quiet after 7 hours of sleep! I imagine it like this:

3 a.m. Prayer and devotions
3:30 - 5:30 a.m. Work (writing and attending to correspondence)
5:30 - 6 a.m. Greet the sunrise! Shower and dress up
6 - 6:30 a.m. Assign the day's tasks to household help, prepare baon
7 a.m. Eat breakfast with the boys

The rest of the morning I can devote to my family and myself, like bring Vito to school, play with my younger sons, have breakfast with my husband, do errands, go to the gym. I don't need to worry about work because it's been taken care of. Then I can spend a few hours in the afternoon working again—meetings, events, taking pictures of products, shoots, etc. Then dinner at 7pm, in bed at 8!

It really sounds amazing except for one thing: where does my marriage fit in this scenario???

Vince and I spend time together at night, when the kids are asleep. That's when we talk about our day, watch TV shows or movies, be married. If I sleep when the kids sleep, those precious few hours spent nurturing our relationship will be gone.

I am obviously resisting the early wake up call, right?

One of my favorite Bible passages is from Psalm 5, which clearly says we call unto God as soon as we wake up.

I haven't done any devotions in months. Months! This spiritual drought is costing me my relationships here at home. Since I start my day in chaos, everyone is affected by my panic and stress. I'm rushing everyone. I snap at the smallest things. I yell a lot. Not proud of that and I hate to blog about this nasty side of me. That's why I'm not blogging! I don't want my nastiness to leach into such a public space. But here I am, being honest, and hoping that maybe you relate, understand even, and maybe give me some advice. I really need to change how I start my day.

When I used to start my day with prayer and devotions, I was kind, generous, patient, forgiving... basically a much nicer person. Of course! My husband has told me more than once that he likes it when I'm attending to my faith because I'm just a nicer person when I pray and read God's Word.

I feel strange sometimes. My life is amazing. AMAZING. I look at my kids, my husband, my work, even myself—it's crazy how lucky I am. And in that same moment, I'm also looking at my pimples and flabby belly, at work deadlines and how I can earn more money if I were just a bit more organized and have more time to work, I look at the mess of Legos everywhere, and the fact that my husband and I never get to finish our conversations because the kids are always interrupting, and I'm filled with irritation.

I feel like I'm living everything I've ever dreamed of (and beyond!) and at the same time I'm losing control. I'm happy and grateful but I don't act like it. I don't want my husband and kids to think I'm unhappy and I don't cherish our wonderful life, because I am and I do. Oh, how I do!

So... yeah. I haven't really been the kind of wife and mommy God wants me to be lately. And I think it all boils down to me not having a good morning routine. In fact, I need to change my entire day. I need to devote time not only to prayer, but to my kids, my husband, my work, my home, and myself. How is this even possible??? I'm so overwhelmed. I don't know what to do.

How do you do it? Please help! I'll try to implement some changes (like maybe sleep earlier!) and will tell you how I'm doing in a few months! Wish me luck!


Helpful reads:
10 ways successful people start their mornings
Why creating a meaningful morning routine will make you more successful


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