Thursday, June 25, 2020

Watch the Mad Men theme song but with a twist

I'm on YouTube a lot these days. I love watching music videos of my favorite songs, interviews of my favorite stars, and home tours of tiny homes and expansive mid-century modern mansions. So imagine my delight when I found this video! I just had to share it with you in case you're a Mad Men and Moulin Rouge fan like me.


If you put together the iconic opening credits of one of the best TV shows of all time and the opening scene of my favorite movie of all time, you get this:


Gorgeous! The song "Nature Boy" is so Don Draper!  

There was a boy 
A very strange enchanted boy 
They say he wandered very far 
Very far 
Over land and sea 

A little shy and sad of eye 
But very wise was he 

And then one day 
One magic day he passed my way 
And though he spoke of many things 
Fools and kings 
This he said to me 
"The greatest thing 
You'll ever learn 
Is just to love 
And be loved in return"

P.S. I'm happy I've learned the greatest lesson in life =)

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6 reasons couples should sleep in different beds

Confession: I don't always sleep in the same bed (or at the same time) as my husband. People tell me that not sleeping in the same bed will lead to marital woes. I see their point and I don't disagree. But sometimes I have to work in the dead of night when everyone's asleep. I think I'm also going through menopause so I'm always hot. I want the fan and the aircon on—full blast! So when I do sleep in our bedroom, my poor husband freezes even under the sheets and wakes up miserable. That's why when this guest post landed in my inbox, I just had to share it with you! Tell me if you know exactly how I feel!

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GUEST POST - Is your marital bed feeling like a storm-tossed ship? This is the case in many homes. As much as the couple tries their best to persevere through the challenges, sleep deprivation can affect a marriage in many ways. If getting cozy sleep is affected by the tossing and turning of your partner, it is time that you consider sleeping in different beds in separate rooms. 

Sleeping separately should not be a reason to freak out as the reasons for this may boost your sleep and improve your health as well. Although most couples feel like their sex life will be affected negatively, this is not the case. Give this a try to see how it works out for the both of you. Read on to find out other reasons couples should sleep in different beds.

1. You have different sleep patterns. 

Not all family members have the same sleep patterns—from the children to their parents. In the same way, not every couple share similar sleep patterns or circadian rhythms. As a result, your partner's sleep pattern may be interfering with your sleep quality. If he is suffering from insomnia, for example, you may want to stay up and keep him company, or his tossing and turning may keep you awake, too. Insomnia is not easily solved by just telling your partner to count sheep. Sleeping in different beds or rooms is one way to solve the issue. 

2. You desire different mattresses. 

It's true that once you are a couple you should learn to compromise on many issues. How about when the type of mattress you share is not right for one of you? It is easy when the mattress is not right for both of you—just get a new purple bed mattress to sort out your mattress issue. But when you like a firm foam for your bad back and your husband wants a nice soft mattress to curl up in, there can be no compromise. Someone's going to have poor sleep quality and this will lead to a disagreement that will affect your relationship. Try sleeping in separate beds with mattresses of your choice. 

3. You have poor sleeping habits. 

Does your partner fall asleep only when he's watching a television rerun? If this is not a fun activity that you do together, both of you will suffer in different ways. Particularly, if your sleep habits are completely different from one another. Such as one has to listen to music and the other wants complete silence or one wants the lights on and the other needs complete darkness. There's also different sleep hygiene—one likes lots of pillows and wrapped in smelly blankets while the other can only sleep on crisp, bleached and starched sheets. These factors can cause sleep fragmentation and non-restorative sleep that cause you to be irritable and fatigued the next day. Again, sleeping in separate rooms may be the solution here. 

4. Your partner snores.

Have you ever considered kissing your partner good night and then retreating to separate rooms? If no, then you must be lucky to not have a snoring husband. Once your partner starts snoring, you will consider sleeping in another room as a perfect option as his snoring will drive you nuts night after night. The snoring issue is common among many couples and it ends up in a conflict that may affect your relationship if not solved. Just as individuals that sleep next to a freight train are disturbed with loud and irregular sounds, a snoring partner will interfere with your sleep cycle, preventing you from reaching the deep sleep stage that makes you feel refreshed in the morning. One step to solving this particular sleep deprivation issue is to discuss with your partner about consulting a doctor for it could be health-related. Meanwhile, rather than sneaking to the couch in the wee hours of the night, discuss sleeping in separate rooms, too. 

5. Your daily routines clash.

Your sleep may be disturbed by different daily routines, such as when your partner works in an evening shift job. This is a common issue that affects a couple's sleep patterns. Hence, choosing to sleep in separate beds will give both of you peace of mind especially when one is an early bird and the other a night owl. 

6. Your partner is too hot. 

If your partner rivals a flaming log, this is another reason you have to move to a separate bed. There is a certain room temperature that is conducive to fall and stay asleep—between 18 to 22 degrees Celcius is the recommended range by sleep experts. When it comes to couples who sleep together, the heat under the covers may be more than the optimal temperatures. When the temperature goes way up due to a partner that generates a lot of heat, it will affect the other one who ends up tossing and turning and waking up soaked with sweat. 

In conclusion, a couple having to sleep in separate beds is quite a sensitive issue. However, who discusses their sleep compatibility as they are courting their partner? It is important to make sleep a priority for you and your spouse. Also, help each other solve any sleep-related issues that make you not achieve perfect sleep. Besides, it's not just your marriage at stake here. Lack of quality sleep can lead to other chronic illnesses as it gets worse by the day like cardiovascular illnesses, diabetes, stress-related illnesses among others. Consider sleeping in separate beds until the issue you have is solved or if there is no other option for better sleep. 

* This is a guest post, with my edits. To place a guest post, email frances@topazhorizon.com. 
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Tuesday, June 23, 2020

Tips to select the skirt that suits you best

Anyone who ever followed my old blog series, Fashion Fridays/Topaz Fashion, would know I love wearing skirts. I like long skirts, pleated skirts, pencil skirts, full skirts, skirts with deep pockets—I love skirts! They make me feel pretty. So when I got a guest post submission today about selecting the best skirt for you out of the many skirts for sale, I just had to publish it!

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GUEST POST - A skirt is never just a skirt. Like any piece of clothing, it should not just be functional but also express who you are. It needs to make you feel comfortable while serving the needs of the day. It should make an impression on others, and that impression should be positive. Here are some ways to select the skirt that suits you best.

Your skirt and your body should go together. 

Long doesn't have to be boring. Just get a fit that hugs you in all the right places. Only P1,553.42!

Skirts come in several shapes to suit every kind of body. The skirt you choose needs to look good and feel good on your body. So choose a shape that flatters your figure. Some skirt selection decisions are obvious for that reason. For example, a form-hugging pencil skirt is perfect when you want to highlight your tiny waist and wide hips. Very sexy!

If you want to show off your legs, a mini is great. The shorter the skirt, the longer your legs look. At the same time, however, a short skirt might not be an ideal choice when your legs are already long. It throws off the proportion of your body. Often, a skirt of a mid-range length is ideal because it shows some leg while keeping your look proportional. 

Choose the fabric that suits your needs.

Denim—the working man's fabric—is comfy and versatile. It can be sexy, too. This skirt is just P931.53!

Knowing the fabric you need or want also makes buying a new skirt far easier. When picking a fabric, you need to think about things like general comfort and how well the fabric allows airflow. A denim skirt or denim blend, for example, offers a high level of comfort. Certain blends also have additional ability to stretch, which may be important to you, especially if you intend to buy a tight skirt. Some fabrics like silk, chiffon, or lace are very pretty but can be flimsy or too high maintenance. Those would be great for a special occasion but not for your everyday needs. 

For daily wear, denim skirts are a popular choice. Denim—or the material used for jeans—is among the most long-lasting and low-maintenance fabrics. It's a safe bet for repeated use because they are comfortable and easy to care for. That's why there are so many denim skirts for sale today. Denim isn't suitable for every occasion and place (like a wedding or at the office), but if you choose a dark color and simple line, it can look formal enough to wear to a lunch out with family or a date. 

Don't be afraid of patterns and colors!

Give off a tropical vibe in this cute mini. Only P1,190.95! 

When choosing a skirt, look at color for inspiration. First, check what colors are already in your closet. Plan to buy skirts that will go with the shirts, accessories, and jackets you have to make the best and most number of combinations. This is a solid plan so you can make good color combinations ahead of time. 

Another thing you have to figure out when buying a skirt is whether you want a solid color or a pattern. Both options are fine, with some exceptions. For example, a solid white skirt will be harder to keep clean. Also, some patterns may make your butt look flat or your belly more rounded. 

Make your skirt work harder.

This bright pink skirt can be used for many OOTDs. And it's just P879.23!

When you finally choose a skirt, it's important to make the best use of it. Having a skirt you love is not enough. You have to know how to wear it in many ways. Don't be afraid to change up how you accessorize it. That way one skirt can help you create many excellent outfits. Pair this bold pink denim skirt with a statement tee and sneakers for a fun day with your girlfriends. Go high-low with a luxe silk blouse, blazer, and pearls for a creative work environment. Liven up an all-black outfit (black turtleneck, black tights, black boots) with this loud pink. 

* This is a guest post, with my edits. To place a guest post, email frances@topazhorizon.com. 

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Wednesday, June 17, 2020

Dreaming of India: 7 Must-See Places

My favorite book in all the world is The Far Pavilions by M.M. Kaye. It's all about the love story of a British soldier and an Indian princess. However, it's not as simple as that. This love story is set in the period of the British Empire and it's an eye-opening look at oppression, religious conflict, slavery, colonialism, and patriotism with beautiful stories of lifelong friendship and brotherhood all woven into a massive epic that is, lest we forget, an unforgettable love affair. 

That's why India's always been on my travel bucket list. Just to see all the places described in Far Pavilions. I've always wanted to see the majestic Himalayas (they're always described as majestic), the temples and palaces, Rajasthan (literal translation: The Land of Kings), the vast deserts, the women, the men. So when I was asked to publish this guest post on the 7 must-see places in India, I agreed! And now I want to go see Incredible India!

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GUEST POST - Life has changed for everyone since the start of the COVID-19 pandemic. While it is not the most important thing that has changed by any means, one of the most common things I’ve talked about with friends and family that we are feeling right now is the shift in summer plans. Summer is a popular time to go on holiday and it is just not safe (nor allowed) to travel internationally right now. However, there is no harm in planning long-term or talking about places you’d like to go once all this is over! Plus, it’s a great way to stay positive and have something to look forward to. 

A place that is on my bucket list is India. It is such a fascinating place, with a rich culture, history, and tradition. 

Here are 7 must-see destinations in India: 


Chennai 

Chennai is a gateway to the south of India and it has a gorgeous city landscape and diverse population. It is a unique city in India due to two primary things: its local culture is based on Tamil traditions, and it will be among the newest megacities with the highest population density. 

Bangalore 

Bangalore is the capital of the state of Karnataka and is known as the Silicon Valley of India. Even as a megacity it is one of India’s most livable cities with large, green spaces and continued development, and is actually India’s most livable city. 

Jaipur 

Jaipur is the largest city in the state of Rajasthan. There are a number of palaces, castles, and temples to explore here, including the Amber Fort, Nahargarh Fort, Palace of Winds, Water Palace, and more. 

Varanasi 

Varanasi is a gorgeous and spiritual city located in the north of India along the left bank of the Ganges River. It is a sacred place for Hindus and Jains, and more than a million pilgrims visit the city each year. It is also famous for its production of silks and brocades. 

Udaipur 

Udaipur is a gorgeous city in the state of Rajasthan that is famous for its gorgeous lakes. It is a romantic city filled with gardens, forts, temples and palaces, while being situated up off the lakes and gorgeous views at every turn. If you plan on visiting, check in to see if there is a festival around the time you’ll be there, as it is a city that hosts them all year round. 

Delhi 

Delhi is the capital of India, and it offers so much in regards to arts, history, and culture. Must-see sites in the city include the Red Fort, the Baha’i Lotus Temple, and Jama Masjid. This is a city where dining out, visiting sites, walking around markets, and enjoying the nightlife will keep you busy and you’ll instantly pick up on the liveliness of the city. 

Mumbai 

Mumbai is the largest city in India and the most popular to visit. Located on the west coast of India, it is a city on the sea with countless places to explore. A must-see is the Gateway of India as well as the Haji Ali.  

India is a fairly large country and there are beautiful towns and cities to discover on every corner. So this list is definitely not complete, but just some of the must-see destinations! 

* This guest post was written by Mary Davis, a freelance editor and copywriter. To place a guest post, email frances@topazhorizon.com. 

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Thursday, June 11, 2020

We love the man that cooks pancakes in our house

I know there's a big box of Maya Pancake Mix in the photos. It's only there because my youngest boy likes reading packaging while he eats. So while that's the only brand we do buy, this isn't going to be a pancake post. It's going to be better. It's going to be about the man who cooks pancakes in our house. And I happen to be married to him.


There are many things I can do, but cooking pancakes isn't one of them. It's easy enough but I decided early on in my mommy life that I don't want to cook pancakes simply because I wasn't good at it. It's a selfish thing, I know, because I could've practised till I got perfect at it. Especially since it's so easy when it comes in a box, right? I get guilty about it sometimes because my kids love pancakes. But I do so much already, you know? Do I have to be good at everything? Does motherhood demand that?

Well, maybe it does so I'm beyond grateful that my husband swooped in and saved me from this expectation. I didn't see myself as a damsel in distress. I was just a tired mama. How many tired mamas are there in the world? And how many of us have a husband who says, "Go back to sleep. I got breakfast." Not many of us, sad to say, but I do. And he doesn't know how nice that is but I do.


It's not just breakfast, too. He's like the instant pancake chef. When the littlest boy asks for pancakes, his Papa drops everything and whips up a batch. Breakfast. Brunch. Lunch. Merienda. Dinner. Not all the time and not all day because my kids may love pancakes but they don't want them every day. So when they do ask for pancakes, their Papa is happy to give them that.

The boys are always happy when their Papa is in the kitchen. As feminist as I am, I must confess that I'm still the one who cooks. Thankfully, it's not because my husband thinks women belong in the kitchen. It's simply because I was raised to be a housewife so I'm just better in the kitchen than my husband. We're trying to teach our kids differently. Mama cooks, Papa washes up. Papa is learning to cook more dishes, too. Japanese is his thing now. He's spending more and more time in the kitchen and getting the boys to help him out. So now we have 2 sons out of 3 who want to cook. Ladies and gentlemen, we are succeeding in this thing called parenting!    


Parenting is not easy. We all know that. Even something as simple as cooking pancakes can break you. My sorry story was the kids complained that my pancakes were too thick and chewy. How I was able to fail so miserably even though I used that same box of pancake mix broke me. I was in the middle of my postpartum blues when this happened years ago. And I snapped. That's it! I will never cook pancakes again!

It was just a tantrum. I got over it soon enough. But instead of telling me to stop being immature, my husband just decided he'd take over pancake duty. He saw beyond the anger and saw my despair. Such a small thing to be upset about, right? Anyone would've told me to snap out of it. Anyone else would've dismissed me. But my husband didn't. And that is what makes him special.

"Look! It's Papa's heart, Mama!"

I don't know if my kids know this, too, how special it is to have a papa who loves their mama so very much. I grew up with a mother who would cry to me because my father ignored her needs all the time. So I learned to harden my heart and keep quiet about mine. My husband has to figure me out. Sometimes he gets me wrong, but just the fact that after 22 years he still keeps trying is more than enough to convince me that this marriage is not like the marriage I grew up watching, that what I have is magical and special and truly the stuff that fairy tales are made of. Except mine is real.

Maybe my husband and my kids don't know how nice that is. But I do. Oh, I do. 

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Update, January 2021: This blog post is part of my first book, Not Invisible, my mom-oir! Grab a copy from Ukiyoto Publishing and Amazon.
 
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